Inconvenient Insomnia

I can not sleep. It’s 3 am soon 4,5 etc. I will be up to change my addresses via mainly phone work with appropriate agencies… It’s vital I exist where i live legally or dialysis is on my dime not the insurances. It’s just as obvious I can’t sleep because I’m scared of success. To combat this, I’ve wasted the most appallingly boring hours trying my damnedest to not save the world but take achievable steps towards my goals. I would say dreams but if one puts dates to dreams they become goals. Scary thought hoping how some school project at 44 years old yes school project shows my diligence and intelligence enough to be courting money successfully… But I don’t want it it to appear I’m haughty… I want innovative modern but thus tried tools I’m both able to deploy on scales thus costs acceptable …but I don’t want my yesterday’s of nothing but minimum wage and stagnant opportunity… I want more.

I choke on a simple list of alphabetical a to z a few times streets being a nothing project yet it was suddenly a major intellectual blockage.. so I took my years on years learning neat weird things online and found a -z lists and began associating what sounded weird but campy real for a free-wheeling once mining maybe town… My other blog lists that as “working around the blocks”. And then previously on almond offers, I having mid project suddenly have to move out of state as my housing evaporated, wanted to demonstrate nothing is gonna break my stride….a fine 80’s tune by Mathew Wilder who later brought us the production of Christine agulara as reflections the main theme of Disney’s “Mulan” which I find amusing as Mathew Wilder in “nothing is gonna break my stride” mentioned in lyric “sailed off to China in a little rowboat to find ya” and this means In “Mulan” Wilder is a popular musical contributor to that movie. And so just as much of my life is within Colorado you’ll see that I hope I represent beginnings common to towns and later development…or failures.
But most of all I want my fake town to feel real… I’m silly that way. I only expect to create a town large enough to have a city public transit offering robust enough to require schedules. I want a feeling of plausible growth. I’m finally beginning that reality.

Here is that town model

What this is for is that schedule which with signs at each stop labeling stops accurately as they’re individually also labeled, I can duplicate in my schooling the final project of a real time text query system to tell you in the fictional town of “Double-cross” when your speeding bus is coming.

I’m not sure any of this helps my goal of making more money. I want to be making more money. I’m trying not to let anything stop me from completing my goals… Even if I’m self-paced and now self monitored from my helpful lighthouse for the blind of Pinellas county Florida… Beginnings. I now am elsewhere but don’t you dare say I can’t.

Projects they help me establish
Typing speed and accuracy
Excel as well as the Microsoft office suite
Adaptive software to both read the screen and or enlarge it so I may as a legally blind person reenter work
Sql instruction
Css instruction
All of these make my project above possible in real ways. I have struggled to get these opportunities going only to start dialysis then have my housing change not just to another county but now across the country. I am not rich thus no longer own adaptive computers…
This problem is partially settleable by two or three places I know of

Littletons public library because I’ve used it, has a seperated blind adapted computer room.
Or did.
Colorado talking book library, a state Depot of getting my entertaining books to me the blind and or physically handicapped.
I may also find luck with computing borrowing or resources through
The national federation of the blind I Littleton.

It isn’t enough I use pen and paper or bulldoze my way to completing this task absent of adaptive computing underlying each and every skill… What would be the point to show you something already implemented I many large bussystems including the area i live now and where I moved from? I mean hahaha. Who’d care? But if I fundemetally understand the concepts of this project and demonstrate testable skills sets, and the competently with the help of adaptive equipment… Hopefully you might agree I may improve my luck finding opportunity.

I’m doing this with the help begun of
Florida states
Division of vocational rehabilitation
Division of blind services
Lighthouse for the blind parent organization of American council of the blind… I believe
Transferring to
Colorado institutions

It took me a year to date to get this far with the enormous amount of paperwork and seemingly frustrating delays. I may be nine more months starting all over in Colorado paperwork!!!

All I can hope you see is determination to have me my chances again. I’m not kidding, I used to be able to see just enough to manage differently… I otherwise can no longer read all registers books computer screens from any distance complex signs like your number in line… So I either learn a new way or I never work again.

I may be technically disabled even sickly… But I’d rather not wish this to deny me my dreams… And we all know most of us gotta work for our dreams. But I’ve help…no guarantee just I have help…. This is some proof of what I’m doing with it.

By Starman Jones

Everything and Nothing interests me. I cook read, write and even have to clean. I SHOULD NOTE: I'm 40 something.

6 replies on “Inconvenient Insomnia”

Goals and dreams and planning is so vital to all of us…no matter what our obstacles and challenges in life.
Your heart, your brain, and your sense of humor (all 3 amazing!) will get you far and farther! πŸ™‚
HUGS!!! πŸ™‚

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