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leftover jokes

how did i spend my extra day… oh puke, it’s spent remembering today’s family visit and the joy seing while not my choice the healthy switch for the old place i lived changes as in feel that they’ve long stayed in effect.  how i should plot my month’s shoppikng desires as it’s nearly time to make them achieved. and otherwise waiting- it’s one more day efore my monthly cycle begins again.   in a way it feels like a bad joke, one more day just about when it’s least wanted timing=wise.

 

what did monica lewinsky find in her dress? : a wad of bills. say it like it’s coming out a lotta almost.. it’s still awful.  or the, why pick hillary, bill didn’t.

 

or my attempt at math humor that no one seemed to enjoy – 😀  some folks like to say god’ll never give you more than you can handle.  the what is a keg?  -if one notes liquor humor… a handle used to be a beer according to lingo circa seventies, boz scaggs: lido shuffle … the wheels just stopped long enough for him to grab a handle off the top of the rack… but nowadays i hear it to mean a one seven five.  the joke here biomathmatically is most of get spinnin around three drinks- even the boz scagg’s version of a handle can be more than this buta a keg of three point two percent beer  a keg being sixteen point five gallons which is quite quite a lot to try to consume either pissing or sweating it out… i currently cant do it in 24 hours… is sixty seven drinks versus even pure alcohol in a handle of nowadays is  at the mythic half not   the same as a keg and it’s difficult to find 3.2 beer anymore expecially in a retail keg. so therefor it’s more than one can Handle. in more ways than one ;). but to explain this means? i ruined the joke and the math’s slippery anyways as a one point seven five liter bottle is subdivided as 50 ml shots make 35 seeming shots but at doubled stregth plus as say ever clear that means technically there’s seven drinks in a handle thus defeating the keg’s alcohol anyways anaology and beside a shot is 44 ml not 50 thus increasing the math complexity and deafeating the joke altogether even if biologically not many of us can consume even with help a keg of beer in a day a lot of help maybe. a bar’s worth of help get two but again whatever joke ruined 😉   and a healthy male in the hottest of dry sun sweating can lose 2 cquarts of  12 gallons in a day dry heat  sweating leaving only 4 gallons to be peed.   the caloric impact  8 days of over eating in one day however would be enormous. and while that’s highly unlikely it’s just this shave of possible seemingly but it’s not really 😉 exeedingly unlikely as one cant necessarily absorb all that liquid fast so one could massively exercise through ten k calories or so to only gain  weight ..as there just enou time in the day isn’t. not many of us can run thus on a full stomac.

 

ahh leftover bad jokes.

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About Starman Jones

Everything and Nothing interests me. I cook read, write and even have to clean. I SHOULD NOTE: I'm 40 something.

One response to “leftover jokes

  1. HA! (the Monica joke!) I snorted! 😛 :mrgreen:
    I like math humor! 😀
    One time I was kicked out of a math class…I had too many in-fractions! 😉 😀 My math teacher was a good dancer…he had algorithm. He had 12 children, proving he really knew how to multiply! 😀
    Love your leftover jokes!
    And the extra day is history now…mine was a good day, but your humor made it even better! 🙂
    HUGS!!! 🙂

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