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From Before.

https://www.google.com/maps/@39.931056,-105.096383,3a,75y,177h,90t/data=!3m4!1e1!3m2!1shRa0ef_sMY-ihklJEOfPMg!2e0
this link should show the little blue try-level that once 24 years ago was home.

https://www.google.com/maps/place/860+W+132nd+Ave+%23369,+Westminster,+CO+80234/@39.9356482,-105.0015334,17z/data=!4m2!3m1!1s0x876c75a7e54dc597:0xe580f37bf2160517
this will not show the picture of the slightly bigger blue now last spotted peach mobile home which from the balling is the lot closest to the bull creek… it ceased even being temporarily home 11 years ago.

What neither map will tell you is what it was like once upon a long ago.

it was always uphill both ways
always to and from in the sun
I saw the neighborhoods go up
and them stale as time goes by
it was a spiritual playground.

how can I remember seizures
I had to rewire this me.
but I do remember cement
the stars laughing at my stories
sending spiders in case dreams fail

and when mom stole christmas away
friends disappeared in droves like poof!
it was then I saw the ‘alone’
sure mercy exists I found friends
one here one there but no forest

then those unmistakable winds
troubles to say it’s met its end
the move. the chance to tidy up.
I’ll never forget that odor
HAH! funny, I learned there to cook

but what of the exploration
each place was wider circlers still
one unit of scope larger still!
how I took myself anywhere
I still didn’t connect the dots

while I wanted away bad
there must have been some spirit glue
I had to stay – I was last gone
first – theirs baby theirs and then me.
I still get the most parent time 😀

some images were bad bad news
full speed face done failed and slid
pulling the handlebars back out
knowing this angle means more pain
and there wasn’t but homeward trudge.

there were magic how, um, the heck?
I still can’t sort out how I fell
I’ve not seen a larger spider
well I’ll be, he jumped seven feet
not all of it was like harmful

but travel now back to the ghosts
it’s improved heh landscapes there now
once dirt is now cement. murder.
who’s not drawn back to the past’s web?
I know the spider’s there….hungry.

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cussables

I’m reasonably prepared to hope I’m asshole lite enough to seek additional employment. I have a downtown staffing agency. I have chosen this because I’m blind, reasonably capable of typing and phone answering atop filing and sounding competent even if I am not, added to which I am expected to direct and or work with other professionals while maintaining the utmost care and fidelity of sensitive information. I’m thus vetted and remain able to pass a background check and for all they know, drug free *anyone who has seriously read me knows this is likely to remain so. thus wish me luck as I won’t make it with what I have as easily so I want to try for more again still. pray I do not have to prove every work when I can and have already so I might, have a hope of instant work…but if I must suffer the irritant of my choices and other’s suspicion, may I shut my damned mouth to teach the stupid fucks what a badge actually means when attested to with current employment- .e. your work of vetting is done fucktards. I can not remain employed at a place requiring law compliance with arrests even. so I’m not just drug free sillies, I’m arrest free. with far more of a background proof that your hsitty company offers. yes, I want to remain asinine enough to do my snobby job justice but yet not forget I want more money. I’m sick of other’s procedures as they interfere with my MONEY. but, pray with me i shut up long enough to realize there is procedures and I do want a job.

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Beer.

Beer. I like it. Quire a lot of it leaves this house. I want to brew it. I’m fairly sure this is a hobby thing as there isn’t likely any REAL savings to this plan.

About my most desired beer of the moment is, of course, one I can’t get. Benediktiner hefewissen or a dark wheat beer of South-Estern Germany – near the Austrian border.

Financially, there is just NO savings in home brewing really. HOWEVER, it isn’t without advantages… providing one serves good “stuff” up and only home-brews, there is no reason savings is to be achieved by having PLENTY when it’s of a less desirable nature than what’s available with their wallet’s elsewhere.

I know enough to be dangerous… shhh. I have brewed/vinted many gallons of ciders to wine. this is NOT unlike beer production. I know my process and desires admits without question that craft is shit compared with commercial offerings … mostly due to more people desiring less haze and chew to beer which also includes the live yeast for the bellyache…and a variety of other factors all adding up to:

do one’s best with temperature control as flavor is here – just like tone is all in the mechanics of the guitar player’s hands. be scrupulous about cleanliness as it’s going to hold the results if not make them.too. remember well that while filtration is going to happen via many handling processes, filtration of beer removes both tastes and carbonation of beer to varying degrees…but clarity is a hallmark of what people want.

so, I expect to brew which I’ve done enough of, filtrate the results to pride’s clear beer 0 recarbonate all the while remembering if necessessasry to pasteurize my outcome to hold it for the 40 days good to great beer lasts…and admit upfront that I’m more in keeping with the enemy of “real beer” in that I appreciate and want consistently commercial style beer versus crap craft beer.

have I pulled the 300 dallar trigger? no because it’s 1200 for a righteous setup and the sundry invests over time to produce all the batches required to break basic even. this is a LOT of money much of which is due up front as in 1/4th. thus there is a huge financial outlay to make shit and own attic fodder. I’m not keen on that risk entirely.

however, if one thing is certain, having 5 gallons of good enough homebrew on hand can say something like woot, free beer, all you want. well home brewing is tempting to not directly save money but ultimately come out prettier due to the effort.

it’s all for naught if it’s more like 600 down to try appropriately. thus is more than i have to part with next month. to beer or not to beer, that is the question whether it is nobler in hops tones to brew up one’s savings indirectly or suffer the forever gouges of outrageous prices tacked to their shelves.

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Re. Spect. / H8red

Let’s face it, we live to get ours. often this means not money but something as intangible as deference.
I’m not uncaring. I do give a crap that you are happy. but I also have this anger that I’m sure isn’t uncommon that says I hope you get yours…either way…positive or negatively as is YOUR choice.
I’ve also grown angrier in that not enough of my efforts resulted in positive results to make it seem entirely unfair to my cause so that I’m being picked upon by the universe… so i’m all the more interested in others getting more of what I got …. in fairness 😀

but the more things go according to another’s plan fucking me over, the more bitter I become. however, has anyone ever noticed that this is precisely the dark road to entitlement? I work something and expect a specific result…I deserve it? but there is also a paradox in play too, if I say I’m not garunteed or worse deserving of anything – 10 people agree instantly and I’ve called to being anti-entitlement while I could have just as easily..to a lesser 3 people agreeing chose to say I deserve it all…. not a should cares save that I make that choice. I have a fan club of my decisions either way :D.

I caught myself twice complaining yesterday only to achieve it…foul whining…one more time three. I compensated by bringing over a strawberry cake roll because it is a choice to call forth positivity or the other darknesses. people truly care…but it’s subtle how… they do indeed follow one’s “vibe”

so, not that it’s going according to hoyle or anything 😀 but, I’m fighting successfully to be a step closer to debt – free. I have the weekend where I’m seen to be covered with not looking like I feel I am. I have a date, not romantic, with my boss to improve our offering with any luck just when I’m the thinnest i can possibly be… yes, fighting to be ahead when it feels otherwise 😀 such is the nature of investment… you do it at the lowest ebb to make the largest gains in fortunes. it is still a risk though.

I’m ready because i saw something to invite one over to make a go of showing why I’m 40 not 20. I’m about to go into beer brewing. I know quite well this means a hateful washing down spring cleaning style my house in anti0 bacterial/mold/funguses of my preparations areas it means fuck tons of investment to try something not garunteed. but, if successful fully, I have a system whereby I can spend 6 a gallon beer versus 12. six into 600 is 100 gallons or 20 rounds of brewing JUST TO BREAK EVEN. experiences enough show me that this is really 60 because of replacements and inefficiencies BUT that’s still about ONE YEAR’s worth of brewed at savings. I can’t justify the expense so I’m not going the savings route but the hobbyist route. I’m curious to pony my experiences making wines and directing other’s efforts to be fulfilled in beer productions. I literally can go through a gallon a day around this house with ease. or it’s not beyond reason I could repay this investment with good drinkable beers off in 14 months. I’m a anti craft production person in that I want my her clear and smooth thus will strip the ever loving fuck out of the mud that is left in craft beers with clays filtrations. I know thus I can impress far more people with my efforts because of this. I can also do so at savings. I’m not without heart to the joy of beer, but I am not into “quality” so much as economy quantity of quality. I know this sounds big bullshit company beer talk where piss water is the result, but let’s face it, most people pay for piss water gladly over this supposed quality of craft…which Ipersonally think is gross. there is nothing like live yeast to make you sicker than a dog drinking a beer….. nothing. pasteurize your shit and filter it too!

I’m interested first in the closest I can come to a benediktiner style beer. if you’ve never had a benediktiner beer, it’s a southern german style roasted dark wheat beer. I’ts quite delightful. if i am right i will have beer in 50 – 60 days per batch and will thus be doing a dad’s day special on how fucking genius I am. I am not a genius in this respect – I mean I have my paper saying I am one…mommy saved it for me….but genius of execution is different than genius of promise. I look forward to making quite drinkable b- grade bullshit on a budget if I can. I know not to expect I will make my money back which is what hobby means but… if I do then I’m a genius on the 66 batch. how auspicious a number. I mean 40 bucks made/saved is significant. it’s a family meal not slogged out of your own hand…cheap sure but, still. I wish to have 3 cornilious kegs on tap with dark wheat, orgasmic coffee stout and some kind of biting bitter ale. I mean such has a way of getting mooches please and pickled..


respect is is I believe a fragmentary line by pant era which goes like ” re. spect are you talking to me?”
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=AkFqg5wAuFk pant era – walk.

h8red?
you’ll have to suffer the full persistence in time album by anthrax
https://video.search.yahoo.com/video/play;_ylt=A2KLqIKAnxVV1joAQyksnIlQ;_ylu=X3oDMTByZWc0dGJtBHNlYwNzcgRzbGsDdmlkBHZ0aWQDBGdwb3MDMQ–?p=h8red+anthrax+persistence+in+time+album&vid=a32526e1b4934cdce79516d808d25a2c&l=58%3A50&turl=http%3A%2F%2Fts3.mm.bing.net%2Fth%3Fid%3DVN.608020498921163090%26pid%3D15.1&rurl=https%3A%2F%2Fwww.youtube.com%2Fwatch%3Fv%3DcOJSS9h0dvo&tit=Anthrax+-+Persistence+Of+Time+%5BFull+Album%5D&c=0&sigr=11bi14ede&sigt=11abmm69n&sigi=11rp7go81&age=1401882531&fr2=p%3As%2Cv%3Av&hsimp=yhs-002&hspart=mozilla&tt=b

but, hating you and being angry is what is called for today. with love 😉 of course and damn everyone. 😀

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Then, What?

I walk to the street corner. As I’m blind and fully loaded with groceries, I hit the buttons of legality. Two different emergency calls are in progress and need the intersection and blaze through as I wait like anyone not wanting to be mown down by speeding steel. The lights reset away my chances to go. I am reminded of the joke where those who run lights and or jaywalk will have to stop twice at the “next one” I most certainly did.

I went a second time on missions to get things at the kmart on my was to the wait three lights at the intersection cause I gotta or step just twice and be dead as the dodo…. knock three time on the ceiling if you want me, twice on the pipe means the answer is no – on the off chance anyone likes that sixties pop gem. I didn’t blow the budgeted payoff!!! woot. of course it’s reminding me of all the things crashing like a wave about done with it’s roll all these little things I must have ignored… but you can grab a drink of not water and go ahhhh around here. I’m pleased. you can make a round of oven able snacks and have the foil for the pan. paper plates to enjoy it and trash bags to schlep it all out and away.

I thought amazingly funny as in odd on the way to the bank for my last 270 so i could make enough change equal a pack of cigarettes. my area? I thought it messy with littered smokes… oh lordy was it far filthier and worse in areas I thought were cleaner… more butts, more of those butts smoked to the nub nothing left. but what was more fun still was the patterns of where i knew there’d be the piles… I could just see the seen, know that person – and never once failed to guess it right… what was funnier still was the obvious higher class places of car sales where you had to walk around back to smoke as they knew the clientele is far more anti low class smoker. I should say cigarette as these folk would be the snuff users or the cigar not cigarette consumers.

tonight, other house cook made up the swag paneer, a nice london broil marinade and in general there was much fun taste testing the recipes. also on hand was pizza and beer.. a different pizza was available earlier as well.

I remember still the evil line: it’s later than you think. I lately have another divination warning in force too, I will not win the fight. I know I do not want to admit I know in my shaded from logic heart that these statements are profoundly true. I may pay this or that off but I will not “win” the fight. because it is simple, respect isn’t whether I have 3 months cash in the bank and am three months ahead. I also know it’s later than i think as in I best get after whatever dreams while I still can…. I’ve been a decade into diabetes as my uncle is now into amputations. okay I’m younger and oddly enough try harder in successful ways with great fundamental habits to be stable if not actually good….but it won’t matter if I get a few months in the bank and thus can begin to say not just NO but go fuck yourself you evil count cow – which isn’t how I feel about my supervisor but self respect and in general reciprocated respect is a lot of how much no one gets away with saying. just being obstructive isn’t the full way to respect… nor is being an asshole to woman a great way to get and keep one- but there is something elusive about power and that force of said we emanate outwards to attract the world or repel it away. perhaps this is though not the time to but try anyways, I would lie to meet and borrow for a pleasant evening a couple of nice folks. right now, I want to have this sense I’m worth it I did my share … this is why I know I won’t win the fight and it is later than I think. I just await the universe or someone to say okay, then what?

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PUN-ny

Hey! Did you hear Apple corporation is coming out with a new device? iBelieve! it’s aimed at capturing the conservation religious market. This device is stu;ed tp be reminiscent of a electronic PEZ dispenser with a light of face of YOU0KNOW-WHO with voice recognition of key religious vocabulary to then light up and dispense a special koolaid flavored confectionary product.

Is it wrong to put elderberry jelly upon children’s breakfast toast?

Why is it B vitamins are for sanity…should they be called Be’s

is it wrong of me to get a marinara for preparing dinner for westerns’ movie night…the spaghetti western?

why is it the height of sheik to have devices and or people whom hang upon your very voice….. I thought we shunned shizophenria.

I have to be round0about ish to achieve the dream of a raise. so considering the country I live in’s tax incentive i get 400 hours at x one year same four hundred hours a 1/2 the next yearend here I am after all of that at no incentive left making the most I ever could …what a surprise i make less than ever… okay that’s more not very ironic than an actual pun.

adobe is a brick style of home construction so adobo or adobada is of course where it all falls apart in chili water??

I never ever wanted to try so hard when the best i can do is try the least?

why is it we love to say something easy is a breeze…yet still think it’s mostly a bad thing when things blow?

how come the attitude of not caring is prized above all else for success yet we still want and pick a mate who we’d toss if they didn’t care for us or grow that way quickly to care for us more than life itself?

and while we’re splitting hairs of paradox, why is it we want what we can’t have and hate it when dew do get so lucky to acquire it?

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outlandish


two maps, one with the satellite look of what’s actually there, then the second for the political realities of the how it’s really carved.

a picture on SMALL scale to illustrate hot water erupting forth.


clouds forming…over…uh hmn, desert. of course it’s the wrong one!

now because I paid a pile of your tax money school was always free for me, i have a fine book

okay mine wass second edition but the price is about the same…. i can

now point you to the mauritania, which is originally a french colony and heavily arabic, yet mauritania has a fine access to an ocean where water comes lays about and a desert otherwise already known as the sahara

https://www.google.com/search?q=bentonite+clay&client=safari&rls=en&source=lnms&tbm=shop&sa=X&ei=ErEJVY3XK8SnyASqsYGIDA&ved=0CAcQ_AUoAQ&biw=1350&bih=500#spd=3326076769507719429

I love the name alone 😀 now I probably can no longer find the scholarly papers on how it take x amount of clay mixed into the soil…10% ish to mae a stabilized earth/sand crust

now the sand’s become a crust and most of you have gone away…. blue oyster cult, astronomy. secret treaties; 1974 how apropos as I came around then and this is uber secret outlandishness! to

imagine a straw sunken beneath the sands to take from the ocean all the water required transporting it about the 1000 some miles inland to be desalinated and burst into the sky first to create a mist which is cooling and then the clouds above

o tonight I’ll ask the stars above
“How did I ever win your love?”
What did I do?
What did I say
To turn your angel eyes my way?
jeff healy, angel eyes… good tune you should spin it.

now it takes little imagination to realize I’d want me a fine lil reservoir as it’s not a lake so much as man-made 😉 to contain an island

the reason is clear in that I would as anyone want a bit of time to hold the dream in case of the pipeline failure… and I want my own island as I’m greedy so shhh it…

now

it isn’t too hard to see that such can be the landscape… a hidden oasis. water aplenty as the eyes could imagine, and grass farther than the eyes can see. why?


scrawny-ass heard of antelope but at least there is more than one! for you see, why would I start being vegetarian? antelope is damn tasty too….plus it serves as a focal point to hold other critters or draw ug, people.

now in time imagine


probably are thinking cyprus as I am but it’s an african bloodwood tree swamp side… and trust me you need some swamp area to oh a few miles…to have MODERN SANITATION for a small city

do not think me so short sighted that I want to go shoveling when I can sit and flush.


an example of what and why bloodwood might be nice… a purdy floor.


garish coffee table?

or perhaps you didn’t recognize the first trees??


perhaps a few stands of this stuff for you carb haters. you know one has to have something to make beer.

and that… you know a fine beer is darkly roasted wheat


yep, that ‘ll get one sideways.

but perhaps

Gucci Jeans $525 Ivory Cotton/hemp Logo Embossed Lightweight Denim
Gucci Jeans $525 Ivory Cotton/hemp Logo Embossed Lightweight Denim
$345.00 from eBay – auspicious one

yes, hemp things sell for large PILES OF CASH.

you know industry?


on tin manufacture… okay it’s annoyingly indian but, industry is industry and one has to have jugs to catch the hempseed oil…fuel or high cost fad oil for omega 3’s.


or perhaps some tea… come on land china up!


yes food and drink if tea won’t take maybe roobios or mate will. big ol steak and a dashing beverage both boozy or not so boozy who cares mmmm. you can’t say you’re not salivating.

all because of a big straw poked over to the juicy bits on earth. not bad for outlandish ideas,

4 inches of mixed clay/sand baked can support a jeep cherokee fully loaded or west weight. or was it six whatever! grassland straw makes fine hats or by bulk is also tilled/turned into the soil for feet upon feet of rich dark nutrient rich soil. some rotting veg matter from stream/lakesides too. miles of meat alive and kicking. oceans of fine grain for breads and or beer.

is it so outlandish that all it is is a few acres of solar cells to run a pumping system and later geo thermal desalination station and then watch pure cloud form over a lake miles across with a tidy island paradise nestled in.

no I didn’t finish the tipples, I am not on something per say either. it is mathematically possible if one

has
a

diamond as big as the ritz, f scott fitzgerald.

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Remember when?

about this time

2 years ago – I began full days volunteering to see about getting a job. it worked as soon as they fired the first pick for never showing up.

3 years ago I had to move as the letter said my lease no longer was being honored nor the price to it…my roommate lost his financial means and had cancer to boot.

4 years ago i finished my first week volunteering at where I now work – 4 of 33 perhaps remain the same.

5 years ago I just survived the moving costs to be sorta free again..sigh of relief!

6 years ago the whole family was together as everyone’s but Mom’s places went belly up.

7 ago had me just into mom’s as I was sick of waking up where the decor was “like a nightclub threw up”

8 years ago it was a new chance at the same old scenario of the siblings want to move but without me it wouldn’t fly…I move in and a week later one bait and switches the move right on out.

9 years ago I was up north by metro standards happy I didn’t hit the furnace on button so that power consumption was pretty much as programmed.

10 years ago I weighed 205 not 165. I just signed into a 3 year lease. thus, I could smoke in the house… felt like a king…shhh, of course ew to most of you.

11 years ago I had just returned from traveling about the country. it was rather neat to see gettysburg national battlefield.

12 years ago I was dead broke in the middle of the nearly 2 years of waiting for ssdi as I had missed a letter from ssi so was suspended as it pretty much did my whole life. I had references and finally showed the evil signs of eff this noise during an interview…needless to say if one can’t handle an interview one can’t handle a customer nor a job of them.

13 years ago I just called on a letter on the 15 day of 14 max and they meant it sea.gov I wouldn’t get a cent for 2 years nearly.

14 years ago I was just between oklahoma and colorado as my 3 week love affair had went south….and I north.

15 years ago I had no idea what life was to bring but improvements at work…nope…anything meaningful? well sure but lol…just wait.

16 years ago I was honestly trying…the math looked perfect to just try for that grandfathered benefits thing even if the word was they were taking such away.

17 years ago I was in crushing love with the radiologist at where I volunteered. it nor a job directly from this experience were not to be.

18 years ago is about as blank as 2003 as I was in-between opportunities.

19 years ago I became a company guy not a temporary employee at a customer service entity that is now a school but originally was a vacant warehouse of western electric…which via a flood killed a homeless person and previously was one heck of a sight when the tornado hit it in 86 ish.

20 years ago I was just hired into my second together full time job. obviously I’d lose one swiftly but as I didn’t choose fast enough it was the better one of the two… I kept seven eleven graveyards woo decking whoo. this means I also started as a regular smoker as well, no, I haven’t quit yet.

21 years ago I was going to fail school. I’m not good at french via immersion. tin ear. I didn’t think twice as I worked the lab in question and had heard it failed to save…there went composition too.

22 years ago I was not yet out of high school – I was a peer counselor sitting for a spell with a couple of pretty gals…no luck mind you…working circles amounts on checks and subscription postcards for a living.

23 years ago. there just about seemed no end to the misery of nothing in sight. just NOTHING… I didn’t know I’d gain a gal pal soon enough, a job with a room full of gals even if that’s a cathouse of hell when the last thing they wanted or needed was a teenaged male… don’t worry they didn’t hint, they said so 😉

24 years ago we hadn’t moved from the family home across town downward in the socioeconomic scales so it still was shitty neighbors and the cops to listen to often enough I knew the faces.

25 years ago. hell! I hadn’t anyone to really talk to, most of my long standing friends had to move including the first love affair. it was not a surprise I had the confidence of a quiet mouse so failed public speaking outright. I thus had no success regaining the build able for only others glory of what was before. I hadn’t the grades for sports. I had shaky enough times at home with one job showing signs of it the lynch pin of finances about to dissolve…yet mom and pops for other reasons too got along somewhat poorly. I was also adamant if anyone listened 😉 that I wasn’t part of that church thing.

26 years ago I was a god. okay, second string defensive tackle for a team that never turned anyone away so we fielded 45 players. I had someone to fondle and chase. I found kurt vonnegut.

27 years ago I think it was this day I turned around during a film to a punch in the face… I think he really wanted to see the show. :S

28 years ago I opened the door and saw her rise obviously to shut it…there is a time in life to become fully aware of what is out and about.

29 I remember detention. I think I earned this one 😉

30. I didn’t know that breaking my arm twice was the end of my hopes in sports… not from the injury but it’d be 4 years til I fought for another unsuccessful bid at lasting sports legacy. I really am not-so-hot at any sport being blind but, for that moment it was mine the empire of adulation, to know I brought in the winning run when everyone thought I’d one two three sit down…it was t-ball too so thanks for the confidence jerks!

31 okay maybe not to the day but about this time I think I go burnt for knowing the answers to a test the incorrect way.

32 years ago yep, detention or some other embarrassing event. sis was here and I was a middle child. about to enjoy another 3 years to live down any number of nicknames only to gain another.

33 years ago. I remember beginning to love watching for the mail. I didn’t know why but I got to see my name on some. sure I know why now, I was disabled and during a lovely time of unemployment/layoffs I got to help the ship not sink at least in namesake.

34 years ago I remember having just written a story courtesy of the magic teacher’s pull from drawers and learned if just barely how to read. I vividly remember a 12 x 12 cubed thing that showed the 12 x 12 times table. I was a tad ahead in appearances of others even if some wiring didn’t quite the rewire… i.e. I lacked most of the motor control center of my brain from seizures which meant something as simple as the warning of bowels didn’t reach my consciousness…what a mess that ends up being primarily socially.

35 years ago I remember two creatures walking around from the courtyard area of the cafeteria to having one of the hyenas spit the whole carrot in my face… it wasn’t long afterwards I saw myself atop the mound/mountain having defeated/cowed a fourth grader and watching the teacher carry a later friend bodily desk and all out of the room… you don’t need to know that corporal punishment was allowed then and you could hear the whole school away.

36 years ago. I remember the radishes at preschool. I wasn’t then impressed it looked like some scraggly weeds. I remember sitting on a swing looking around noticing most had friends and I did not.

37 years ago mom said she had bad news, there would be and really never has been christmas sense.

I’m not marylou henner, I do not possess a perfect unerring sense of dates and picture perfect memory. but surely you can understand, these are memories none the same and outside of the dates being off slightly, they did occur. I do not remember much of anything significant prior to 3 save plugging a key into an electrical outlet to be seeing a spark like a snake and being well electrocuted or looking over just barely a coffee table out grandmother’s window in detroit town. I am well into 40 years here. just 40 not 41

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trolling the past.

I was trolling history as in my email for a term paper that I didn’t find. I know I have a book draft in there too. I am reminded of the magic of memories. I reread the postings of my subscriptions digest of then xanga.

I am reminded corned beef and cabbage is rather recent and American versus quintessentially Irish. I can’t believe how time flies and that it is only memories that I have as the Irishman in question left due to an illness he courageously fought. I remember that we were to have a bacon and cabbage fry up… he said that was more in keeping with his memories of food… I know rashers exist but they still are not easy to procure or even find in town – oddly enough they’re pretty much a brined pork chop / Rashers…and an early and irritating nickname growing up…prior to me having any rashes or being overly plump. that memory too is but that a memory as that dear old dad has been gone ten years as well.And any exciting cooking probably for a good number of years to come will remind me of the chef who didn’t like eating…she’s gone too. interesting that it’s st patrick’s day that is memories versus a more salient holiday to dance with ghosts – halloween.

I suppose it’s easy to remember in that today or as observed often on it’s nearest weekend to it, St patrick’s day is a fine adult booziest holiday. Like being in the parade for st patrick’s day on the bus in a not quite ken keesian way but you were on the bus or you were not. the smiling finn was idling it down the route. mr aviator sunglasses in a suit with a hip flask of absinthe was generally being “cool” it really was worrisome jumping on and off a moving vehicle but, the bus ride wasn’t free, there was cheering to be done! this memory blends with other times like all the major bars an irishman would visit like fado’s as they’d play soccer and rugby matches, I remember being quite the ass showing up with a bottle of absinthe, which then wasn’t sold. so I wasn’t depriving the operators of cash…although I sure did get a looking down on for breaking the law. or how irish new year is 5 pm the day before as of the time zones…and it was where many a fine evening was had… originally though not with the irishman I was introduced to the place afar a young dubliners concert and as usual, I being clueless met the band in all places, the john….but didn’t know it. 😉 I suppose I should mention that it also was interesting I was only there for a time… not exactly welcome or unwelcome as in I was always greeted with a smile, but, I wasn’t part of the scene unless there with someone who was… I sat in my empty table outside and hardly spoke with a soul. or try to pry away a date before I truly was unwelcome 😉

I had better luck at a dive bar down the road a pace where one could be the title of the joint but more likely a victim of them…bushwhackers. I read of a drink called a lunchbox. i still order them but here is where I obtained the memory… smoking inside on a winter’s night which as you can imagine just is against social rules anymore and then the actual law too for here. I enjoyed my lunch boxes. quite tasty. the vibe never was unexciting or unfriendly. not quite my place like the irishbar above nallan’s where one was part of the group or NOT.

there also was the duff’s which is consigned to history where many a corned beef was had…. I found it while wanting the one who had her a purple felt dress with matching contacts for it. no luck. to continue this no luck, duff’s gets the distinction of being the second time corned beef cost me dearly. I had a fine sandwich and my then favorite beer grolsch which I’d have still love for but it’s just too often skunk….just like my luck with it.. that sandwich and beer was an hour later buying peroxide after tripping over a lot demarkation curb….the second time I took it in the teeth for corned beef …the first was fitzgerald’s now saratoga in blackhawk after remembering the agonies of a molar in decay to find out it had to crumble during my fine corned beef dinner after a bowl of the then best ever potato leek soup with garlic/and mozzarella galore. all those corny bits of bad luck cost me a lot of chair time with the pretty lady dentist with the evil lidocaine needle…and obviously about all I made that year too. it shouldn’t surprise you that the teeth memories were of a place gone to time- the house is there but the ownership changed hands and the lady of the original side of it is…passed. of course time passes and as much as I love corned beef, my kidneys do not appreciate the joys that are a hunk of salty beef…. I’m lucky I can ever have the stuff.

talk about unlucky, my favorites food never has been lucky for me to have… dental woes to plumbing woes and a whole lot of ghost and memories along the way.


lol, turns out to be an English post versus of Irish one….but if it came out this idea of bacon and cabbage… this would be a presentational goal.

now the question is, will I manage to pro cue and present myself in pants anywhere today. it’s only3.5 blocks over and 1.5 down to the nearest cabbage. I could be at the bars any listed by 4 reasonably enough. I could also just about be in the hills with just enough dough to slot machine up some luck…. or, I have insulin and sugar pop and surely plenty enough whiskey to have a snootful here… I really haven’t much of a clue what I should do. none of the above sounds particularly appeaing. but, memories and imaginations come when they do.

it’s also worth reminding you corned beef roast cookers of:
odoulle’s amber – non alcoholic beer. which more so than light lagers or 3.2% or even GUINNESS is thee best for your beer addition to the pot.
I usually do my meat up by itself first for about an hour or two- with 2/1/4 beers.
then add the peeled potatoes and carrots for about 45 minutes
then top this with first shredded cabbage…and then the lid and about 3/4 of another beer.

the staging gives me cooked through cabbage that yt isn’t disgusting over-stewed. my meat’s typically fork spreadably tender and everything else still tastes reasonably like it should but has the flavors.


I would be happy if I got my memories to look like this 😀 oh and before you ask, YES I put in the spice packet with the meat in the beginning. but if I do I have to add a few grains of coriander later to freshen the scents.

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looking about

I awoke early as sis and boyfriend made it to town to set off on their adventure. all I know is kc for bbq, st louis for something / friends of his, chicago – to which I’ll forever want to recommend gino’s east pizza, wisconsining – jealousy here as new glares was mentioned, I nearly asked after leinenkugle’s red but figure nah, space is a premium, and something south dakota. 🙂 you too might be a tad annoyed to watch a chef attempt to leave on time for a vacation… you just KNOW food will be involved. to wit, sam’s diner no.3 was chili rellenos and eggs for breakfast.

I’m looking about as I have about an hour and a half prior to work/bus. I already had a complete breakfast with a morning lemon tea. it feels like a hiccup having to go in for a short bit.

what or what and where:

http://www.ginoseast.com
http://www.newglarusbrewing.com/index.cfm/beers/ourbeers/beercategory/year-round-beers

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